A perfect drink for ending a meal or starting a binge, this week's drink recipe is named neither for the ingredients involved nor the sensation achieved. But it tastes pretty good if you're feeling a little effeminate and plan on drinking alone. A word of warning, stop yourself at two or you'll risk the misery of a cream-curdled stomach just when the good buzz starts. Without further adieu...

WEEK 31:

Multiple Orgasm

1/2 ounce amaretto
1/2 ounce Kahlúa
1/2 ounce Irish cream liqueur
1 ounce heavy cream
1 ounce gold tequila

Shake all but the tequila vigorously with ice. Strain into a chilled glass. Float the tequila on top.

Start with some Disaronno, not because we are making a shameless plug for our amaretto sponsors (anyone?), but because in your average liquor store, there is rarely a wide display of options and any of the cheaper brands drop noticeably in taste. If you're into baking and out of amaretto, try some almond extract. (It won't hurt you...we think.) Now, Kahlúa is the obvious choice, although, any number of coffee liqueurs would suffice. Bailey's Irish Cream is standard, but you won't be disappointed with Carolan's Irish Cream, which is just as good (maybe better) and noticeably more affordable. Now the cream could be half-and-half, full cream, whipped cream, Cool Whip, whole milk, skim milk—-even Soy milk if you really want to screw this one up. The point is, we understand the shortage of heavy cream in the average home bar, and as illustrated, the substitutes are plentiful. If you're up for a long night, try them all. Finally, the tequila is poured gently on top because its a booze for a man's man and not likely to socialize with the creamy pansy party happening beneath it. Use Jose Cuervo, a faithful friend indeed (who will stab you in the back and sleep with your woman the first chance he gets, but you know this, and that is why the friendship works. Besides, the guy can party.) The tequila is there to justify the drink, as we're sure you will quickly point out to the first person who shoots you that inquiring eyebrow. Remember to keep your pinkies down when you sip and you might just make it through the night unscathed with your pride intact.
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